Midgie at Meadowood Saturday 10/29/2005

Saturday morning and an update on your sister, mom, aunt, and grandmother and friend. I look at who has been to the Nutter-Northcutt site and you are the reason I write this about our almost 91 year old southern lady. This is has been and is a tough transition in her's and mine and Jack's life so keep all of us in your prayers. We have to make some critical decision this next week as to mother's safety.

Jesus spoke in parables to the people of his time as he knew they would not understand HIS teaching so he spoke of the times and of fields of grain, planting, harvesting, as these people worked the land and this they knew. I tell people about mom that we are rebuilding her 1991 Oldsmobile as I did for over 4 years. When I finished fixing the car up, it was still a 1991 automobile!

Mom is doing OK and is responding to physical therapy and speech therapy and social activities. The things I cannot provide at her home the social interactions she needs so badly? I am trying to come up with a plan to take her to her home with more nursing care rather than moving her to an assisted living like Galleria Oaks that I like so much.

You have to keep in mind the car I fixed so many years. I fixed the AC, rebuilt GM compressor and changed over to the newer refrigerate, a $800.00 bill. I get it home a day or two and the water pump went out. I replaced the water pump twice and the second time I was north of Atlanta and it necessitated replacing the water pump again as well as the radiator, replacing all the cooling system, again almost $800.00. I replace the alternator as it went out early on when I got the car from mother and it went out again coming back from NC on the way to Gadsden to the Northcutt reunion, $300.00. Jimmy got me to the GM dealer and they replaced it in less than an hour at closing time Friday afternoon. I replaced the battery from Sears, $75.00, as it went out on me one morning going to 513 to take care of mom. Again, new parts being applied to used 1991 parts and you wait now for something else to break.

Mom is like the Oldsmobile when I finally admitted it was becoming a money pit. Mom is not a money pit, but she does have a limited income and limited resources and I have just taken $5,000.00 out to put in her checking account. Just as I did for mom, I went into my back pocket and bought the CPO 2004 Taurus from Town and Country so I would have dependable transportation. They gave me $1,000.00 trade in on mom's Oldsmobile where as the Blue Book said at best, it was worth $500.00. It needed shocks and front end struts, two new Goodyear tires and the headlining replaced so I was looking at another $1,000.00 plus to put into a 1991 Oldsmobile. It was not a hard decision to make was it.

The above exercise is letting you know in my way, you can care and love something but remember it is, or she is, only capable of so much. I talked to Dr. David Barthold, and he told me again she can only come back so far. I share with you what Dr. Christopher Portante said to me when we moved her to Meadowood. "You have not failed! You have been a good son, and she has lived at her home more than 4 years beyond what I gave her and you so many years ago. She now needs more structured care that you cannot provide at home." Please forgive the pronoun YOU, as he is referring to all of us, Jack Nutter, Bobbie, Edwina, Peggy, Rebecca and me. I got the job of managing mom's affairs by default as I had just retired when mom got sick in 2001. Jack Nutter or Bobbie would have done the same!

So it is time to make a big time decision. Keep us, all the Nutter-Northcutt families and pray we make the right decision for mom's care from this next week on. She will be at Meadowood until about Friday, Saturday or Sunday as that is or will be her 20th day. This can change if Dr. Barthold discharges her before then.

Love to all,

Jeff